When someone dies by suicide, the words we use to describe their death can either deepen stigma or foster understanding. Phrases like ‘committed suicide’ can carry outdated connotations of language that can isolate grieving families and prevent those in crisis from seeking help. Today, mental health experts emphasize compassionate, factual language, recognizing that words can make a real difference in prevention, awareness, and healing.

“Word choice is always critical to effective communication, perhaps even more so when working with individuals experiencing suicidal thoughts or behaviors, as well as their families or those who lose a loved one to suicide,” said Matthew Macaluso, D.O., Bee McWane Reid Professor in the UAB Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Neurobiology, Vice Chair for Clinical Affairs and Clinical Director of UAB’s Depression and Suicide Center.

Matthew Macaluso, D.O., and Yogesh Dwivedi, Ph.D., Elesabeth Ridgely Shook Professor, Co-Director of UAB’s Depression and Suicide Center, and Vice Chair for Faculty Affairs and Development, share their insights on the importance of compassionate, person-first language when discussing suicide.

Common misconceptions about suicide

A common misconception is that suicide is a selfish act. In reality, suicidal thoughts and behaviors are often symptoms of mental illness.

“Individuals experiencing these thoughts face immense psychological pain and distress, and understanding this is crucial to providing compassionate support,” Macaluso said.

Another common concern is that talking about suicide will encourage it. Experts say, though, that discussing suicide in a supportive way often helps connect at-risk individuals with the resources and support they need.

“Some people fear that raising the topic might make someone act on suicidal thoughts,” Dwivedi acknowledged. “However, research shows that open and compassionate conversations can reduce the risk of death by suicide.”

Another misconception is that suicide only affects specific communities. In truth, suicide can impact people of all ages, backgrounds, and socioeconomic statuses. This underscores the importance of prevention efforts that reach everyone and provide support for those struggling.

Why language matters

Words influence how we understand and respond to suicide. The phrase “committed suicide” suggests wrongdoing, framing suicide as a criminal or sinful act.

“This can increase stigma, deter individuals from seeking help, and isolate families who are grieving,” Macaluso said. “In contrast, phrases like 'died by suicide' or 'suicide death' are factual, neutral, and compassionate, removing judgment and encouraging support.”

Similarly, saying “working with someone in crisis” rather than “dealing with a suicidal crisis” can also emphasize care and action instead of blame.

Using compassionate language also means choosing words carefully in everyday conversation.

“For instance, avoid saying ‘cry for help’ and instead say the person ‘expressed suicidal thoughts,’” Dwivedi explained. “Similarly, refer to ‘a person living with thoughts of suicide’ rather than ‘a suicide attempter.’ The key is to avoid labeling or dehumanizing the individual, which helps create a more supportive environment for those struggling and their families.”

How terminology has evolved

Over the past two decades, the medical and mental health communities have increasingly embraced thoughtful, person-first language. For example, in the 2000s, professionals began moving away from the phrase “committed suicide” because of its criminal and moral undertones.

“By the 2010s, terms such as ‘died by suicide’ and ‘suicide attempt’ had begun to replace labels like ‘successful’ or 'unsuccessful' attempts,” Macaluso stated. “From 2015 onward, major organizations, including the American Psychiatric Association, have advocated for factual, non-judgmental phrasing, emphasizing person-first language such as 'person living with thoughts of suicide.’”

These shifts reflect a broader effort to reduce stigma and prioritize compassion in public health messaging. 

Talking with loved ones about suicide

When talking with someone you care about who may be struggling, it’s best to approach the conversation with presence and compassion.

“It is important to listen without judgment to create a safe, private space to express genuine concern,” Dwivedi explained. “It’s also critical to ask directly about suicidal thoughts or plans and to encourage professional support, guiding loved ones to trained resources rather than trying to solve the problem yourself.”

Resources are available to help, including tools from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP), such as the “Talk Saves Lives” training, which equips individuals with the skills and confidence to have these conversations safely and effectively. At UAB’s Depression and Suicide Center, Macaluso, Dwivedi, and their colleagues provide education, research, guidance, and support to ensure that families and communities can respond with compassion and understanding.