The end of the school year often feels like a whirlwind for both students and parents. With end-of-year parties, spirit days and field trips stacking up, May can rival December in terms of chaos and activity. For some school-age moms, this time of year has come to be known as “May-cember.”
Margaret Canter, Ph.D., assistant professor in the University of Alabama at Birmingham’s Department of Pediatrics, encourages parents that they can make it through the never-ending to-do list and shares recommendations on how to do so.
Organization
A parent’s mindset plays a critical role during hectic times like May-cember. Negativity can easily overshadow the joy of events for children, turning special moments into sources of stress. Canter suggests that staying organized and focusing on the family’s most meaningful activities can help minimize chaos and create a more enjoyable experience for everyone.
“There are a lot of things happening in the month of May, and it may not be possible to do them all, even though we want to,” Canter said. “I always recommend a physical calendar for families. All the events that are possible/scheduled can be written on the calendar, and then, when necessary, the family can make choices when it is just not possible to do everything.”
A productive and engaging family activity can be to gather everyone together to map out the week in advance. Some children may need help thinking through a study plan for exams, end-of-the-year activities and other responsibilities. Canter suggests designating a specific day for a family check-in to review progress, outline priorities and discuss any support children may need to thrive during this busy time.
For working parents, attending every midday school event may not always be feasible. Having open conversations with children about expectations can help ease parental stress and guilt while fostering understanding and support within the family.
“I try to attend the events I can and adjust my schedule when given notice, but I also remind myself that my work is important for our family too,” Canter said. “My kids will be OK if I can’t be at everything, and I will just try to make the things I can be at extra special.”
Check-ins
Parents should regularly check in with their children to see how they are feeling, how things are going, and whether they need any support or assistance. Since children might not always reach out on their own, parents can watch for changes in mood, sleep patterns, friendships or academic performance. These shifts could signal that kids need to pause, regroup and find balance during this busy season.
“If a typically happy-go-lucky kid is increasingly irritable, snippy or flat out mean, try not to take it personally, but also set limits. A parent can say, ‘I understand you are stressed, but it is not acceptable to speak to me that way,’” Canter said. “Label the change in behaviors, communicate how it makes you feel, and ask the child how you can support or help them.”
Canter says children like playing a part in solving their problems and may be more open to a parent’s help when they realize how it is affecting others.
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Sleep is key
It is important to make sure kids are getting enough sleep as it is crucial for their development and mood, Canter says. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children ages 3-5 need 10-13 hours of sleep per night, children 6-12 years old need nine to 12 hours, and teenagers between the ages of 13 and 18 need eight to 10 hours each night.
“When everyone gets busy, sleep is often the first to go. Sleep is crucial for children’s physical growth, cognitive development, emotional regulation and immune function, so it should always be a priority, especially during stressful times,” Canter said.
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Enjoy the moment
While it may seem hectic and chaotic in the moment, Canter said to remember, “May will not last forever.”
“Before we know it, May will be over, and another school year will come to an end. Enjoy these events with your children, take pictures for those who cannot be there, and soak in the memories. Summer will be here soon.”